I'd also cut the refugee cheese into
tiny squares and throw them into my banana baby food. (To this day I
wonder if this habit was a "Cuban" thing, or something I invented.) Bananas are big with Cubans; it must come from when we were monkeys.
OK, OK. Just kidding. I don't want fellow Cubans throwing banana peels
Anyhow, the moral of the story is:
Forget cooking pasta when you can have bananas and refugee cheese! Refugee
cheese is where it's at!
One of the perks about having been
a refugee is getting all the powdered milk we wanted. Powdered milk
mixed with tap water tasted yummy. No kidding. I'm just surprised I'm
still alive. We also received large containers of peanut butter which
we traded for Spam and canned ham with neighbors. Powdered eggs tasted
too weird and nuclear, to describe, so I won't recommend it. That was
our diet for a while when we arrived from Cuba. So, if you're interested
in something spankin' new, try Cuban refugee food. I'm sure somewhere
in a black market there must be someone selling it! Go for it! It's
really something to remember!
OLIVE OIL AND SOFRITO
Much like los Griegos -- the Greeks
-- we use olive oil for all our saucing. A Cuban household without olive
oil is like a bath without water. Olive oil and sofrito are our secret
ingredients used for cooking black beans, stews, meats, fish, and anything,
really. Meats and poultry are marinated in lime or naranja agria juices
(sour oranges) and salt. We know how to cook slowly till the meat melts
in your mouth. Mami would put a pot on the stove while she bathed, bathed
us and cleaned the house. If you've never had your clothes reek of sofrito
due to slow cooking carne con papas Cuban style, you're not a true blue
CUBAN TUBER VEGETABLES:
YUCA, MALANGA AND BONIATO
As for typical vegetables, I never
knew they existed, except for tomatoes and potatoes. But tomato is a
fruit, the savvy reader is saying to her/himself. Yes. Now that I know,
I realize that growing up I only had one vegetable: potato! Luckily,
I loved stocky meals with potatoes and lots of salsita, 'cause I hate
baked potatoes. They taste like dirty air. Cubans devour root vegetables
in every meal, such as boniato, malanga and yuca. Yuca con mojo is a
popular Cuban dish served during holidays that I, and every Cuban, love.
It's made with mojito: olive oil, lemon juice, sliced raw onions and
garlic. Yuca is exquisite if left marinating a while before serving,
and is a typical Cuban food.
CUBAN BEVERAGES: MALTA,
IRONBER, AND MATERVA
My big brother was fat and round
like a beach ball. He'd eat my food when I wasn't looking. I liked that.
The little fool didn't know that I wasn't looking on purpose. He kept
inflating while I continued to stay thin. Yes, I was a skinny Cuban
kid. Mami couldn't take it. She'd make me shakes with chocolate ice
cream, liver (yes, you heard right) raw eggs (we were raking in the
money and able to buy a carton of eggs per week), Malta and leche condensada.
Malta with condensed milk is a typical Cuban beverage. I always thought
it tasted bloody weird (British pun intended) and I never did acquire
much of a taste for it until I was older. A dear friend handed me a
real Malta con leche condensada and I refused it, but she forced me
to drink it because there was nothing else in the house and we were
starving. Boy, Malta without liver is paradise! Liverless Malta is nectar
for the Goddesses!
Cuban kids must be fed at all times
so that they grow to be robust and healthy. A skinny Cuban child is
seen as sickly. Gossip will abound about the skinny child not eating
enough. I was born thin and small until Mami overfed me. She'd stuff
my face, I'd throw up, she'd clean me up and feed me again. Girls had
to grow up to be curvaceous women, otherwise, Cuban men would not look
at us and we would end up wretched spinsters like some old aunt in Cuba.
Well... I never did gain too much. Luckily, I came out like Papi's side
of the family: Flacos Raquiticos!!! Skinny scrawny rails!
Now comes the brow-raising part
of my article: Cuban Children are raised on espresso. You heard right.
Perhaps this is why we are such a hyperactive, happy-go-lucky bunch.
I'm surprised we haven't invented flying cars yet or used our neuro
energy for the benefit of the planet. I guess we've spent all that caffeine
energy that could light up Miami for dancing and drumming. We are all
like Ricky Ricardo and Chiquita Banana (I can't recall who she was,
but I'm sure she was Cuban)... just a bunch of raucous wild savages.
The women in my culture are very hot, wear heels, neon orange lipstick,
lots of tight spandex miniskirts with boobs spilling all over the place.
Well ... maybe just some of us. You know, the civilized ones aren't
like that. The pseudo intellectual Cuban women are conservative. I guess
they're not into perpetual dancing in the streets and shaking their
bootie to the rhythm of the Rumba...
CUBAN MAMBO, RUMBA AND SALSA
The Mambo and Salsa was probably
invented due to coffee spells. Who wouldn't spin round and round and
swing from chandeliers on that kind of rush?
Back to the Cuban food and cooking
topic. See how carried away I get just from talking about espresso?
As a kid, I remember having tostada
con cafe con leche every morning for breakfast. The smells of Cuban
bread and butter filled the house with the aroma of sugar cane fields
and visuals of swaying palms. I'd take a bite of my tostada and daydream
about going back to Cuba, my beautiful Cuba, the Pearl of the Antilles,
until Mami handed me the cafe con leche cup. My first sip, and I was
zooming! Forget Cuba. I'm out the door! Cafe con leche is made with
espresso, boiling milk, six truckloads of sugar and a pinch of salt.
You're not Cuban if you don't dunk the bread into the cafe con leche
and eat it soggy. The cafe con leche cup will eventually have a ring
of melted butter, which will dissolve in your mouth for a delicious
Break time for every Cuban on earth
-- I don't care if you live in a cave or in the North Pole -- is the
time for a cafecito Cubano. This is how Cubans built Miami... on speed.
Lunches for Cubans are simple, not
a time for cooking. We normally have Cuban sandwiches. The media noche
-- midnight -- replete with slices of ham, pork, cheese, pickles, mustard,
globs of mayonnaise on sweet egg bread is our most common merienda.
The pan con bistec has thin palomilla steak, tomato slices and potato
sticks. Ironber or Malta are the sodas of choice. Mariquitas -- thinly
sliced plantain chips -- always accompany our sandwiches. And after
lunch, of course, it's siesta time!
Cubans don't miss a snack. Pastelitos
(pastries filled with guava, cheese or meat), croqueticas, or papa rellena
(stuffed potatoes) are our daily snacks followed with a shot of cafecito.
Dinners consist of a stocky meats,
chicken, or fish dishes accompanied by white rice, black beans, and
sweet fried plantains. Our family never went a day without a side dish
of sliced tomato and onion salad. Avocados and sliced onions are eaten
sometimes, instead of the tomato salad. A typical dessert is a flan
with a cafecito.
As you can see, we drink lots of
cafecitos. Cafe is in our blood and bones. We are nothing, absolutely
nothing, without cafe!
During the holidays, Cubans love
cooking special food. They roast a pig marinated in salt, garlic, and
sour orange juice over an open fire. Congri -- white rice and black
bean mix -- yucca con mojo, avocado, tomato and onion salad and maduros
are our staples, along with walnuts, almonds and turrones. Materva soda
is our favorite pop.
So now that you know a bit about
Cuban food and cooking history, I hope you enjoy cooking some Cuban
food. You won't be sorry. But you aren't allowed to do what one of my
closest friend does. She was born in the United States and replaces
meat dishes with tofu. I mean, who's ever heard of tofu picadillo? She's
not even a vegetarian for crying out loud! Salt isn't supposed to be
replaced with soy sauce and no, please, don't throw cayenne pepper into
the congri! Make your first Cuban meal a cultural feast to remember
and don't have it any other way but traditional. Enjoy!